To Buy or Not to Buy – the Great Garage Sale Question

Have you ever come home from a garage sale with items that end up junking up your house, and you just give them away or sell them yourself? Or have you ever purchased something because it was “such a deal” but had nowhere to put it, or it just didn’t work at all (such as an electronic item)? Also, some items can be unsafe. To help avoid these scenarios and others like them, here is a brief guide as to what to buy and not to buy at garage sales.

What to Buy

1. Books

You can really get a bargain on books at garage sales, and you can even turn around and sell them online for a bit of profit.

2. Clothes and accessories

The prices on clothing at garage sales can be excellent, and handbags, watches, and jewelry can also be good purchases. No one has to know that your Vera Bradley purse only cost $2! Baby and child clothes are usually fine, and it’s a good bargain since you’re trying to clothe a rapidly-growing child.

3. Dishes

Cups, mugs, plates, and so forth can be great deals at garage sales. They are washable and useful, and you can even hand paint them and give them as gifts.

4. Furniture

Bistro sets, chairs, and other wooden and metal furniture can be great buys at garage sales.

What Not to Buy

1. Safety equipment

Items like motorcycle helmets, horseback riding helmets, and other safety gear is not a great idea to purchase at a garage sale. They might be old and not up to current regulations, or damaged in such a way that you can’t see but that would compromise its effectiveness.

2. Car baby/child seats

Safety regulations are always being updated for car baby/child seats. One that was manufactured a year ago might have been declared unsafe. Also, there might be missing components or damage to the seat that could make it unsafe.

3. Cribs

Like car baby seats, cribs are always being re-evaluated for safety. An old crib that met safety regulations 10 years ago might be declared hazardous now. Unless you’re planning to display dolls in the crib or you want the wood for other projects, stay away from cribs at garage sales.

4. Make-up

Make-up that’s been opened has been exposed to air and bacteria. It’s a good way to get an eye infection in the case of eye make-up, or skin problems if it’s base or concealer.

5. Food

Unless the seller is providing fresh snacks for shoppers, then don’t buy food at a garage sale. People have been known to sell ancient fruitcakes and old tins of cookies – these and items like them can certainly make your family sick.

6. Old-fashioned canning jars

Unless you’re going to use them for something other than canning, old-fashioned canning jars are not safe for canning foods. Unless they are jars with the 2-piece lids that seal, they may be unsafe for canning.

7. Plush furniture

Items like mattresses, couches, and upholstered chairs are probably best left alone at a garage sale. You don’t know what’s lurking in all that stuffing, and getting furniture like that cleaned and reupholstered can cost a pretty penny.

Tips on Improving Your Relationship

Relationships can present many challenges, and no one handles them perfectly. Every relationship has rocky spots and can use some improvement from time to time. It doesn’t mean things are over or ruined forever; it just means you need to make some adjustments here and there. Here are some tips on improving your relationship that may help.

Stop Criticizing

It’s easy to let a simple criticism escape your lips – after all, your partner is engaging in a behavior you don’t like, and the fastest way to get at the issue is to criticize him/her. But all kinds of research shows that criticism is not the best way to get someone to change his/her behavior. It can have the opposite effect, in fact; and if his/her behavior does change as a result of your criticism, it may be accompanied by resentment.

Instead, find a tactful and creative way to address the behavior that bothers you. Remember, your partner very likely is not doing said behavior for the sole purpose of bothering you; he or she is doing it because it works for him/her.

Make It Funny

It’s amazing what humor can do to diffuse a situation. Humor can also help you see things in a new light, and not take things so seriously. Try to make a joke out of annoying behavior and have some fun.

Learn to Let Things Go

This is a big one, and one of the toughest for some people. There’s an art to learning when to let things go and when to belabor the point. One key to understanding when to do what is to ask yourself why you want to bring it up again and again.

Is it because you believe your partner is wrong and you must be right? Or is it because you didn’t feel heard before? Maybe you want to bring it up because you don’t feel as if it’s resolved. Ask yourself if it really matters – in the long run, is the issue absolutely crucial?

Most of the time, it’s just a different way of seeing things. Learning to let the other person be “wrong” is a very mature thing you can do to improve your relationship.

Keep It Close to Home

Unless there is abusive or damaging behavior going on, it’s a good idea to keep your disagreements just between you, experts say. Going to your friends (especially mutual friends), family, and others and talking about the disagreement you’re having with your partner just tends to be divisive. It grows the problem, too – the more people who know about it, the bigger and messier it may get.

Tips on Building a Successful Relationship with Communication

If you’re looking for ways to build a successful relationship with communication, you’re off to a good start. Communication is one of the best foundations for a relationship, and many sources agree that communication – good or bad – can make or break a relationship.

Here are some tips on building a successful relationship with communication.

Understanding versus Agreement

Understanding someone’s point of view is not necessarily the same thing as agreeing with it. It’s possible to hold different opinions on some matters, and in fact, that’s what makes a relationship interesting and challenging. If someone agrees with you on everything, he or she may be pretending!

Understanding means really “getting” what the other person means. Let him or her know you “get it” by paraphrasing what you think he/she means. This makes it a lot more palatable if you don’t agree with him/her; at least the other person knows you do understand, and have thought about the issue.

Building Trust through Vulnerability

This can be a tough one for some, but being vulnerable in a relationship and recognizing and respecting the vulnerability of the other person is an important building block in your communication foundation. No one is perfect, of course; feelings inevitably get hurt at one point or another. But working on sharing those vulnerable tidbits and respectfully listening to those of the other person can go a long way toward building trust.

Mistakes Happen

While good communication is a vital aspect of building a successful relationship, “successful” is not the same thing as “perfect.” There’s no such thing as the perfect relationship! Understanding that mistakes are going to happen and you will get irritated with each other at certain points helps you weather these rough spots. You know they’re temporary, and you know you can survive them.

Even if both of you are trying to apply good communication to your relationship, mistakes will happen. Try to be understanding – you’re going to make mistakes, too!

What Do You Want?

When you first meet someone, your expectations for that relationship may be in one place, but as you get to know him or her more closely, those expectations may change. If you don’t communicate those changing expectations, disaster may result. It’s a good idea to periodically communicate about where you are, what you both want, and where you’d like to go.

Remember, it’s not all about what you want; it’s about the relationship, which is almost like a third entity that you have to consider between you. It’s made up of the hopes, dreams, desires, and potential of both people.

Tips for Organizing a Garage Sale

Garage sales are a fun and wonderful way to get bargains and make some money from your excess stuff. When you clean out your home, you probably see lots of things that are nice – you just don’t have room for them anymore, or they’re not your taste now. But how do you organize all this stuff to sell it? It can seem overwhelming. Here is a list of tips that may help to get you organized, and hopefully make some money!

Categorize Your Stuff

So you’ve got all this stuff around your house that you would like to sell. If space is limited, this can be a challenge – but remember, it’s temporary. Choose an area of your home to organize items into categories. Separate them into themes, like Kitchen, Home Decor, Toys, Adult Clothes, Kid Clothes, Books, etc. While you’re doing this, keep a bottle of spray cleaner and a few rags handy so you can clean up the items as you sort them. This prevents you having to run to the sink to clean items during your organization.

Decide on Your Setup

If you go with tables, figure out how you’ll set them up and where you’ll acquire them. You can make tables easily with sheets of plywood set on cinderblocks, bricks, paint cans, or even books. You can also use blankets and sheets spread out on the ground.

No Yard or Garage?

How do you sell stuff if you don’t have a proper yard, or if you have a difficult-to-access piece of property? Find out if you can hold your sale somewhere else. For a percentage of the proceeds, see if your neighbor will donate his or her yard or driveway. Or contact the owner of a local store and see if you can use the parking lot, or find out if your place of worship will let you use their basement or lawn.

Pricing

Now that you have your categorized items, a location, and a set-up in mind, you’ll need to price your items. One of the easiest ways is to group items by price – “Everything on this table/blanket: $1.” You can put individual prices on larger single items. Be willing to come down on prices if people offer you something reasonable, especially if the sale is about to end.

Change

Be prepared with lots of small bills and coins on the day of the sale. Someone will inevitably hand you a $20 bill for a $1 item, and if you don’t have the correct change, you may just have to lower the price (they may not have $1 but they’ll probably have a quarter).

Unsold Items

Part of organizing a garage sale is to have a plan for items that don’t sell. You can give them away to a second-hand store or haul them to the dump; the point is, have a plan so you aren’t putting all your stuff back into your house at the end of the day. Borrow a truck if you need to, and have bags handy to stuff unsold items into and toss in the back.

Tips for Getting Great Deals and Garage Sales

If you are shopping at garage sales, chances are you really like a good deal. And garage sales by their nature present some bargains. But you can do even better! Here are some tips for getting great deals at garage sales.

Be Friendly and Courteous

One of the fun things about yard sales is getting to know the seller(s) a bit. For most of them, this is their house and their stuff (and their garage!), and they may be your near neighbors. Don’t, for instance, speak negatively of any of the items (“That’s so ugly!” or “That’s so dirty – it needs a good cleaning.”). Instead, compliment the seller on his/her house, yard, and so forth. Striking up a conversation and being friendly may make the seller more inclined to give you an extra-good deal.

Use Small Bills

This is not just to facilitate making change. Using small bills helps prevent you from looking like a rich person trying to get a deal. If you haggle with the seller to get an item down to, say, $1, and you hand the seller a $50 bill, it just doesn’t look good (plus, that’s a lot of change the seller has to muster!).

Pile It Up

As you find items you like, ask the seller if you can set them in a certain area or place them in an empty box (you could also bring your own cardboard box). This can be a boon of a bargain – the seller may let the whole lot go for a great deal less than if you’d bought and priced each item individually.

Early versus Late

Many people will tell you that going early always scores the best deals. While it’s true that there may be more choice items early on, there may be super-good deals later when the sale is closing up. You’re likely to get good deals either way. Ideally, you could hit the same garage sales early and late. It’s perfectly acceptable to make two trips if you have the time!

Have a Plan

Just popping in your car on a Saturday morning and driving around looking for garage sales can be fun, but it isn’t a very efficient way to find good deals. Instead, look for signs that people put up toward the end of the week, look online, and look in the newspaper. Make a rough plan of where you’ll hit first. Pack a lunch if you like; that keeps you from having to shell out money at a restaurant, which would offset all your great savings.

Make an Offer

Don’t be bashful about making a reasonable offer (make sure it’s not insulting, like proposing $2 for a $35 item). This may come in particularly handy when the sale is about to end. Even if prices are set, it never hurts to ask. The worst the seller can say is no.

Tips for a Healthy Pregnancy

Every mom wants a healthy pregnancy, but with wives’ tales and weird advice always popping up, it’s hard to know what really helps and what’s just myth. It also helps to talk to a qualified professional in addition to your doctor, such as a nutritionist, about what you can do to be healthy during pregnancy. Here are some tips for a healthy pregnancy that may help clarify things.

Up the Leafy Greens

Dark leafy greens are nutritional powerhouses. Increasing your intake of all fresh vegetables and fruits is a great idea, too – just make sure you eat as “colorfully” as you can, and go heavy on the dark green. Broccoli, kale, chard, spinach, and mustard greens are all examples of healthy greens.

Frequent Healthy Snacks

Protein, protein, protein! A pregnant woman’s need for protein is significant. It ties in with blood sugar regulation, too (see below). Professionals recommend snacking frequently – almost constantly – on high-protein foods like protein bars, whole grain crackers and nut butter, and lean meats.

Blood Sugar Regulation

Some pregnancy and birth professionals present compelling evidence that nausea and vomiting during pregnancy may be due in part to low blood sugar. Help combat this by sipping watered-down juice during the day, or make a healthful ginger-lemonade by sweetening ginger tea with raw honey and lemon juice and pouring it over ice (or drink it hot). Ginger has been shown in studies to help relieve nausea, and the honey will help keep your blood sugar steady if you sip it slowly through the day.

Early to Bed…

…frequent to rise! Yes, pregnancy can be disruptive to sleep. This is another reason to go to bed early – you’ll need more total hours in bed to get the rest you need. In other words, because the quality of sleep during pregnancy is not necessarily great, you may need to increase the quantity.

Stretch and Move

Throughout the day, take some time to stretch and do some movements beneficial to pregnant women. If you have a chiropractor or personal trainer, he or she can probably help you develop a set of exercises and movements you can do at home to keep your body aligned. Speaking of exercises…

Regular Exercise

A light exercise routine has been shown to contribute to a healthy pregnancy. Once again, check with a qualified health professional before embarking on an exercise routine, and choose one that’s designed for pregnant women. Water exercises, Yoga, and Pilates are a few of the more common pregnancy exercise routines. Walking every day can also be a simple and effective exercise.

The Role of Listening in Effective Communication

It’s important to recognize that communication is a two-way street. Communication happens as much with your ears as with your mouth. Listening is a form of communication that “speaks” to the other person without even using words…or at least not very many!

What Listening Communicates

What are you communicating when you listen? For one thing, you’re letting the other party know that they matter; their opinion counts. That’s a pretty powerful message! If you establish this basic truth early on in the conversation, you can expect some of the following responses.

* Receptiveness – A person who feels “heard” is a person who is more likely to be receptive to what you have to say.

* Safety – The other party might be nervous or anxious about discussing things with you. Establishing that you care about the other’s ideas and opinions makes him or her feel safer, and better able to open up.

* Friendship/relationship – This kind of listening-based communication can really deepen a friendship and any relationship. If you weren’t friends before, maybe you feel close enough to establish a friendship now that you feel you can trust the other party enough to be friends after your conversation.

The Art of Listening

The role of listening in effective communication means some pretty specific behaviors. Here are some suggestions for practicing the art of listening.

* Don’t jump to conclusions – It can be very frustrating when you’re trying to tell someone something, and he or she keeps jumping to conclusions before you’ve said everything. One way to avoid this is to really focus on what the person is saying rather than on what you’re going to say next.

* Cut the nervous chatter – Sometimes, silence in conversation makes people uncomfortable. But idle chitchat can be distracting, and opens the opportunity for you to say something you don’t really mean or that you haven’t thought through first. It’s okay to tell the other party that you can’t answer something right now, that you need to think; and if you have trouble thinking there on the spot, you can simply say you have to think it over first. This communicates to the other party that you did hear and are considering what they said, even if you can’t respond right now.

* Paraphrase – Sources agree that repeating back what the other party just said in your own words – i.e. paraphrasing – is an important point of effective communication. It communicates to the other party that you did, in fact, listen to them and you are making an effort to understand.

Teaching Teens to Be Tactful

Have you heard your teen on the phone with your relatives and been horrified by his or her tone of voice? Have you heard your teen blurt out something hurtful and you just want to hide? It happens. Teens are still learning; they are children in many ways and adults in others. This combination of child and adult is part of what makes parenting teens so challenging.

So how can you teach them to be tactful? Here are some tips.

“They’re Just Kids”

While it can be very embarrassing and frustrating when your teen says something inappropriate, it helps to keep things in perspective. Kids have to be taught when it’s appropriate to say something and when to refrain; it doesn’t mean they are horrible people. As you teach your teen tact, it helps to remember that you’re dealing with a child in many ways. This is not meant as an excuse; but it can help you keep your head level.

Let Them Know How They Sound

When your teen says something tactless, wait until the heat of the moment passes and then speak to her about it. Without mocking, let her know what she sounded like, and ask her how it would feel if someone addressed her that way. Sometimes, teens don’t realize how thoughtless or even mean they sound. If you can predict the tactless moments, you can even have a camera ready and show your teen a clip of how she sounds when she talks to her siblings, parents, or whoever.

Another Empathy Exercise

Encourage your teen to read, particularly literature with “good guys” and “bad guys.” Or pick up what your teen is reading and find out what characters he relates to. Now ask your teen to re-tell the story from the bad guy’s point of view, or ask him to think about how the story would be different if it was told through the bad guy’s eyes. Ask him to write a paragraph explaining this. It’s a good learning exercise, and forces them to see the other’s point of view.

Be Tactful Yourself

Sometimes, we hear ourselves in our kids. When your teen is being tactless, evaluate your own speech and attitude. Do you treat your teen with tact and respect, or are you snappy and insensitive yourself? Everyone has bad days; but if this is the primary way in which you relate to your teen, then you may be part of the problem. It sets a bad example.

Teachers and Students: How to Build a Relationship

Building a positive relationship between students and teachers is important, regardless of the age of the students. Pretty much everyone who went through a public or private school system knows that your relationship with your teacher(s) can have a lifelong impact. Don’t we all remember the “mean ones” and the “nice ones”? The impact of the student-teacher relationship reaches far beyond the classroom.

Here are some tips on how to build a relationship between teachers and students.

Individual Personalities

As teachers take on the task of building relationships with their students, it’s helpful if they take their students’ individual personalities into account. One size does not fit all! So as you look over these tips, bear in mind that not everything will work with each student. Don’t be afraid to be creative, and enjoy your kids’ quirks and differences!

Developmental Stages

There is an enormous difference between a kindergartener and a fourth grader, and even in the same grade you have kids at different developmental stages and ages. Some kids, for instance, are eight years old for the entire second grade year; others don’t turn eight until the end of the year. They can be almost a year apart, yet the eight-year old may be less developmentally mature on some levels than the seven-year old.

It can be challenging, but setting up your classroom in a developmentally-appropriate way can help all students feel calmer and more trusting of the teacher.

Face-to-Face

Sources agree that face-to-face contact between students and teachers goes a long way toward building the student-teacher relationship. Get down on the child’s level when possible, and engage him/her in conversation. It doesn’t take long, but when a student knows that he or she has your attention, you’ve already begun building a positive relationship.

Listen

An offshoot of the point above, listening builds relationship between students and teachers just as it does between adults. Part of listening is creating an environment where you can listen – after all, you can’t listen to 25 kids at once. But if your classroom is ordered without being oppressive, there should be all kinds of opportunities to listen to your students.

Encourage

During the busy-ness of the school day, it’s easy for teachers to forget to encourage their students. Try to acknowledge not just perfect performance, but also honest efforts at improvement. This helps prevent kids from getting discouraged. Sources say it’s best to deal quickly with challenging behavior and minimize it, while always being on the lookout for opportunities to praise.

Give Age-Appropriate Responsibilities

Students often feel so proud of themselves when they are given responsibilities around the classroom. Try to give everyone a chance and not always choose the same student to do the tasks. Look for ways to show your students you trust them – ask them to clean the chalk board, clap the erasers, run paperwork down to the principal’s office, etc.

Steps to Effective Communication

You’ve probably heard that good communication makes for better relationships, whether at work, home, or elsewhere. But how do you get there, exactly? Here are some practical steps you can take to help you with more effective communication.

Identify with Your Audience

Whether your audience is an auditorium full of people or your significant other over a candlelight dinner, the principle is the same: identify with the one(s) you’re speaking to.
This means finding ways to relate to the person or people you’re speaking with, and finding common ground. Show that you understand where the other person is coming from, for example, or point out shared experiences.

Watch Body Language

To communicate effectively, it’s important to note and comprehend the body language of others. If someone is not looking at you, looking down, or looking around the room, it’s probable that he/she is not listening to you. Crossed arms, turning the body away, and leaning away also indicate someone closing themselves to your words. There’s a reason why it’s called the “cold shoulder” – turning your shoulder to someone is a strong indicator that you aren’t receptive to what they’re saying.

On the other hand, someone who is making eye contact, smiling, and facing you fully is more engaged in what you’re saying. He or she might lean forward a bit, too.

The reason this matters is so that you can adjust your speech accordingly. If someone is clearly not listening, yes, it might be their problem; but it’s also a possible sign that you are talking too much, being offensive, or otherwise not enjoying a rapport with the other person/people. Following some of the advice here might help, so read on!

Listen

Communication works both ways. Think about how you don’t appreciate it when others don’t listen; it’s important that you do others the favor of taking in what they have to say. Listening means considering another’s point of view, even if you don’t agree with it, and holding your tongue until the other person has said his or her piece.

Don’t Say Too Much

While it’s good to be personable, keeping your words minimal helps make your communication more effective. This may seem ironic, but fewer words may actually get your point heard better – people stop listening to a babbler after a while, and wonder what your point is. When you finally get to it, you may have lost your audience!

Don’t Fill in the Silence

It’s a good idea to learn to be comfortable with silence. If you’re not, then you may end up chattering just to fill in the void, and then you are not necessarily thinking before speaking (which is crucial to effective communication!). While silence can get awkward, it’s okay to pause now and then, or even just say, “I really need to think for a moment,” and let the silence be a rest between communications.

Social Skills for Young Kids: Parents’ Roles

When it comes to teaching social skills, parents have a significant role to play in the lives of their young kids. Social skills are not just some kind of conformity thing; they are necessary for your child’s academic and social life, and for his or her career after graduation. Parents play an important role in helping young kids learn social skills.

Why It’s Important

Young kids need to learn how to be socially adept for their immediate as well as long-term future. Social skills involve the whole person – emotions, body posture, morals, intelligence, etc. – and how to manage them. Young kids who learn social skills tend to be more emotionally resilient, have better self-esteem, and even refrain from using drugs or alcohol when they get older.

Tips for Parents – How to Teach Social Skills

As parents, you can start early in teaching your child social skills. Here are some tips and suggestions.

1. Respect your child’s temperament

Not every child has high needs socially, and not every child has a high need for alone time. This doesn’t mean that your child can’t learn healthy social skills. Forcing your child to socialize more than he or she is comfortable with could have the opposite effect of what you’re trying to achieve, so respecting your child’s individual temperament is important. That said, all children can learn the skills of social competence regardless of temperament. It just might take a different approach with different temperaments.

2. Arrange play dates

This one can be difficult, especially if you the parent are not particularly social yourself. But try to make it a point to schedule some play time with other kids, even if your child is not in preschool or day care yet, or even if he or she is not going to daycare or preschool.

In fact, if preschool or daycare is around the corner, spending time with other kids before enrolling can help make the experience much more positive. And if your child is not going to be enrolled in school until kindergarten, socializing beforehand will help him or her be more socially adept when they do get there.

3. Play with your kids

Very young kids can only do so much with each other – sometimes it seems like they just play by themselves, just in the same room! To help offset this and train your kids for the social skills they’ll need in group settings with peers, make sure you play with your child frequently.

Your children learn about play through your interactions with them, too. This is because parents who play with their kids have kids who are better able to adjust socially and are more socially competent. It’s a healthy springboard from which your kids can go forward and make friends. Just make sure you play like a child would (to an extent), interacting and getting into the play rather than just directing it. Play with your kids as equals, experts say.

Sandals: What’s Cool and What’s Hot

Summertime is officially sandal season! And 2012 has some good ones to offer. Here are some of the trends this year with sandals – what’s cool and what’s hot.

Flats

There are a few kinds of flat sandals trending this year, which is good news for those who can’t or don’t want to wear heels.

1. Gladiators

There’s no doubt about it – the gladiator sandal is in this summer. Gladiators are nice because they can cover up ankles and calves that may not be your best features. However, the general consensus is that gladiator sandals don’t really do well on women who are short or who have thick legs.

Gladiators come in roughly three heights – ankle, mid-calf and knee lengths. Choose a length that works for your body type and the shape of your legs. For instance, thin, minimal lacing on ankle-height gladiators may work better for those with thicker legs, whereas thinner legs may do better with thicker or numerous laces that are knee-height.

2. Thongs

Thongs are not just to get you over the hot sand to the water in 2012 – thongs come in all kinds of colors now, and you can wear them with skirts and cut-off pants, too.

3. Bows

Sandals with bows are in this year. They are often flat or have a small heel, but what characterizes them is the wide bow that goes across your toes. Bow sandals are usually minimal and strappy, with the bow being the only strap over the foot. Often, there is a thin buckled strap around the ankle.

Heels

There are some seriously high heels out there this year. The strappy look is in, and high heels with slender straps around the ankles are definitely a modern look. But don’t despair if you can’t wear super-high heels – wedge heels are back, and they are often a lot more comfortable and easier to walk in.

Wedges are usually cork, and are worn with casual skirts and loose, short pants.

Colors

The days of simple brown and black and beige sandals are behind us! In 2012, it’s all about the color – the pastels of spring are carrying over into the summer as baby blue, mint green, butter yellow, and pink find their way onto sandals. Bright colors are trendy, too, particularly orange and aqua-blue.

Colorful details are popping up (and out) on sandals this year, too. Rivets, sequins, buckles, and other “bling” are glittering on sandals in 2012. Even braided sandals are coming back, and combined with the colors, bows and sparkles, it looks like an interesting year for sandals!

Pricing Your Garage Sale Items

It can be a bit difficult to figure out how to price the items you want to sell at your garage sale. This can be especially true if you are selling something with sentimental value, or that was very expensive when you bought it new. Remember – this is a garage sale, not a retail shop. You’ll want to sell at garage sale prices, so let’s talk about just what those are. Here are some tips to help you in pricing your garage sale items.

Price Things

Okay, this may seem a bit basic. But too many people give up on pricing altogether and just put their stuff out. Then everyone who visits the sale has to ask you a price, and you’ll have to make one up off the cuff or remember what you’re charging, and you’ll likely lose sales.

People want to browse and compare and budget, and you can’t do that very well if you have to ask about every item. And people who are uncomfortable asking might just leave your sale, even if there was something they would have bought if it had been priced.

In addition, clearly priced items help prevent haggling and bargaining, which can get tiring pretty fast.

Skip the Collectibles

If you have an enormous set of baseball cards from the 1960s, and you know they must be worth something but you don’t know how much, sources suggest that you do not sell them or similar collectibles at your garage sale. Instead, research the item(s) to determine the real worth, and try selling online or to an antique store.

Pricing Items in Groups

Experienced garage sale folks claim that some visitors will ask how much something is no matter how clearly you have it marked. So choose a method that works for you and your stuff.

Price each item. This can get tedious, but at least it’s pretty obvious how much each thing is. You can use masking tape and a permanent marker, or those little round stickers.

What Should Items Cost?

According to various sources, here is a rough guideline on what to ask for which items.

* Books: $0.50 to $1 each for hardback, $0.10 to $0.25 for paperback

* Clothing: $1 to $2 each for pants, jeans, sweaters, and skirts; $2 to $4 for dresses and pairs of shoes; kids’ clothes should be about half of what the adult clothing is priced as

* Kitchen items: $.25 to $0.50 for glasses and mugs; $1 to $2 for pots and pans; plates $0.50 to $1 each. A rough guide for appliances is to ask 15% to 30% of the original cost of the appliance (you could sell a $60 microwave for $9 to $18, for example).

* Toys should be around $0.25 to $1 each

* VCRs: $5 to $15

* Analogue TVs: $5 to $10

* Radios: $0.25 to $3

* Furniture: $5 for small chairs; $10 for small tables; $25-$75 for large dressers, dining tables, and bureaus; $5 to $10 for simple shelves

Hopefully, this guide has helped you in pricing your garage sale items. Good luck!

Tips for Overcoming Shyness

Shyness is not just a personality type or quirk; it’s not the same as being an introvert, although introverts may or may not be shy. While not everyone is a social butterfly – and we can’t expect everyone to act the same way – shyness can really become a problem. It is about more than just being unable to open up at social gatherings; being excessively shy can be detrimental to one’s interpersonal relationships and career goals.

Overcoming shyness is not likely to happen overnight. But there are some tricks and suggestions out there that can help. Here are some.

Body Posture

Have you ever heard the phrase, “fake it ’til you make it”? There’s something to that, experts say, and one of the ways this principle manifests is through assumed body posture. Here are some hints as to what body postures exude confidence.

* Standing straight and tall with your head up sends a message of self-confidence. It is the basic body posture of people with high self-esteem and a good self-image.

* Look up when you walk into a room, and look at people’s faces. Don’t look down at the floor or at your feet.

* Let your hands loose. If you hold your arms and hands close to your body or, worse, up around your chest or belly, you’re showing a lack of confidence. Let your arms hang comfortably, or carry a drink around so you can have something to do with your hands.

The good thing about this is that, when you act confident, people treat you differently. This, in turn, helps you come out of your shell even more.

You’re Not the Only Shy One

Remember, you’re not the only one reading these tips, or searching the internet for advice on how to overcome shyness. Those people around you who seem so confident – people who you never think you can be like or measure up to – may actually be going through the motions of confidence just like you are. Just knowing this can help!

You Really Are Pretty Cool

No one is perfect, of course, and no one has it all – but everyone excels at something. Discover your unique gifts and take confidence in them. Maybe you are the one people tell secrets to, because you’re trustworthy; maybe you make people feel at ease and included; maybe you write, draw, or do higher math very well. Find out what’s uniquely yours and own it!

Force Yourself to Stick It Out

Sometimes, shy people feel so terribly uncomfortable in a given situation that they just want to leave as soon as possible and go home. Try this: force yourself to stay ten more minutes, and in that ten minutes, strike up a conversation with someone. It’s very possible that the original ten minutes will be long gone before you realize it.

How to Enliven Your Marriage Relationship

There comes a point in nearly all marriages where one or both parties feel they need to liven things up. While it’s impossible to travel back in time to the heady days when you first met, you can build on the richness and depth you’ve developed over the years to bring about a new kind of excitement.

Here are some tips on how to enliven your marriage relationship.

Dare to Be Different

You don’t have to share interests to get along. In fact, successfully married couples point out that having different interests – at least some different interests – has helped them grow closer. If your spouse is into something that you admire but are not particularly good at or interested in, you can still respect him/her and support the interest.

Also, spending some time by yourself or with people besides your spouse can be good for your relationship. Absence may indeed make the heart grow fonder – take a break from each other regularly and pursue those different interests.

Now, Find Something to Do Together

If possible, find something new to do together. This will be more like “neutral territory,” without expectations built on past experience. If you’re both doing something for the first time – taking a dancing class, for instance, or doing an exercise routine together – there is a shared awkwardness that can actually bring you closer. And neither one of you is trying to show or tell the other one what to do.

Speaking of Exercise…

Sources say that it really can breathe new life into a marriage if one or both spouses takes up regular exercise. In fact, enrolling in a gym membership together could be a way to do this as a joint activity. Or, just taking up exercise yourself can be helpful. It’s said that your physical relationship is enhanced when you’re in shape, which makes sense – exercise tends to give you more energy and better muscle tone.

Ignore the “What Ifs”

Marriages can be bogged down with “what ifs.” What if I gain weight, have health problems, get wrinkles, burn dinner, etc.? Will he/she leave me? Successfully married couples say that a key to their success is recognizing that marriage is permanent. So letting go of the “what ifs” – whether fear of being abandoned or looking for a “loophole” if you want out – can greatly enliven your marriage.

Remember How You Used to…

Every spouse has his or her way of finishing the above sentence! While it’s true that you can’t expect your relationship to be like it was when you were dating, you can resurrect some behaviors and characteristics that you may have forgotten about, but that really endeared you to your spouse.

For example, you might have taken great care to look perfect and have your hair, make-up, and clothes “just so” before going out on a date, but now you don’t take much time on your appearance. Or you might have been in shape and enjoyed being active before you got married, but now you’re a couch potato. Think about those things your spouse really enjoyed about you when you first met, and try getting back into them now and then.

How Communication Improves Relationships

You have probably heard that good communication is essential to a relationship. But do you know why? What is it about communication that improves relationships? And how does it do that?

Here is a basic overview of the way in which communication improves relationships, and some tips and suggestions on how you can apply good communication to your relationships.

Listening First

Good communication means listening first, and deliberately turning off the barrage of thoughts you’re having about what you want to say next. Experts recommend turning this tendency around so that you are still thinking of what you’re going to say, but you’re thinking of what you’re going to say about what the other person is saying!

In other words, your job as a good listener is to repeat back (paraphrased in your own words) to the other person what you just heard him or her say. This way, you have to listen to the other person in order to formulate what you’re going to say next.

Making Sure You Understand

One of the significant ways that communication improves relationships is that it promotes mutual understanding. This is especially true if you follow the suggestion above – if you paraphrase what the other person just said, then you have a chance to make sure you have it right. The other person may need to clarify some points that you didn’t quite get. This leads to more discussion, which is a good thing!

Not Just Talking

For communication to be truly good, it needs to involve more than just talking. Non-verbal communication is also very important. Body language, tone of voice, and facial expressions are all forms of non-verbal communication. Your friend/spouse/partner/family member may totally misunderstand what you are trying to say if you say it with a tone that indicates something else.

This is how good communication improves relationships – it involves paying attention to how you appear and sound to others. When in doubt, ask the other person or people what they thought you meant when you said such-and-such. What you mean and what they think you mean might be quite different.

Another area where non-verbal communication matters is when you’re listening. Looking at your watch, letting your eyes wander around the room, and fidgeting are all signals that you are not really listening. You might be, but your body language says otherwise. Good communication means you’re listening with your body, too.

Staying on Topic

When you communicate well with someone, you stay on topic; you don’t dredge up things from the past or let the conversation drift into everything that’s ever gone wrong in your life. Relationships improve when you stay on the topic of conversation, because it helps the other person open up more. He or she doesn’t clam up in dread that you’ll bring up the past.

These are just some basics – there are all kinds of ways that good communication can improve your relationships. Try putting some of them into practice!

Five Common Communication Errors in Relationships

Most of us don’t like to admit when we’re wrong, but unfortunately, many of us trip up and make errors in our relationships with regard to communication. This isn’t just about marriage or intimate partnerships, either – relationships between family members, co-workers, and others can all fall prey to these errors. Here are some of the most common communication errors so you can try to avoid making them.

Not Stating the Obvious

You think your husband is automatically going to know he shouldn’t go out with the guys because you’ve been home sick all day caring for your baby? Do you think your wife is automatically going to know how you like your burgers? Did you think your employee would know how to handle that file you just placed in his/her hands?

It may be obvious to you, but it is not necessarily obvious to the other party. Remember, not everyone thinks like you do. And having to tell someone you’d rather they did not go out, or how you like your burger cooked, or how to handle a file is okay. It doesn’t mean the other person is incompetent; stating the obvious is just a part of good communication!

Interrupting

It’s understandable that you have a response to what the other person is saying, but interrupting is a definite communication error. Unless you have a really good reason, such as having to get something out of the stove or answering your phone at work, then let the other person have his or her say.

Not Listening

Listening is part of the back-and-forth interchange that is communication. Many people make the mistake of not listening when they are engaged in conversation. This is true in the workplace, at home, or out socializing with friends. If you don’t listen to others, then others may not listen to you. And others won’t feel like you care about what they have to say, which can make them feel as if you don’t care about them. See why it’s such a detrimental communication error in relationships?

Excessive Use of Sarcasm

Responding to friends, family, and co-workers with sarcasm can shut people down. They feel embarrassed, belittled, and/or ridiculed when you respond to what they say with sarcasm. Remember, not every conversation is a joke or opportunity to look like a big-shot.

Yelling

Yelling does not help get you point across more effectively, nor does it endear the other party to your point of view. All yelling does is make you look like your emotions are out of control. It also tends to hurt the feelings of the other party. Try not to yell; use respectful tones so you don’t make this communication error.