Steps to Effective Communication
You’ve probably heard that good communication makes for better relationships, whether at work, home, or elsewhere. But how do you get there, exactly? Here are some practical steps you can take to help you with more effective communication.
Identify with Your Audience
Whether your audience is an auditorium full of people or your significant other over a candlelight dinner, the principle is the same: identify with the one(s) you’re speaking to.
This means finding ways to relate to the person or people you’re speaking with, and finding common ground. Show that you understand where the other person is coming from, for example, or point out shared experiences.
Watch Body Language
To communicate effectively, it’s important to note and comprehend the body language of others. If someone is not looking at you, looking down, or looking around the room, it’s probable that he/she is not listening to you. Crossed arms, turning the body away, and leaning away also indicate someone closing themselves to your words. There’s a reason why it’s called the “cold shoulder” – turning your shoulder to someone is a strong indicator that you aren’t receptive to what they’re saying.
On the other hand, someone who is making eye contact, smiling, and facing you fully is more engaged in what you’re saying. He or she might lean forward a bit, too.
The reason this matters is so that you can adjust your speech accordingly. If someone is clearly not listening, yes, it might be their problem; but it’s also a possible sign that you are talking too much, being offensive, or otherwise not enjoying a rapport with the other person/people. Following some of the advice here might help, so read on!
Listen
Communication works both ways. Think about how you don’t appreciate it when others don’t listen; it’s important that you do others the favor of taking in what they have to say. Listening means considering another’s point of view, even if you don’t agree with it, and holding your tongue until the other person has said his or her piece.
Don’t Say Too Much
While it’s good to be personable, keeping your words minimal helps make your communication more effective. This may seem ironic, but fewer words may actually get your point heard better – people stop listening to a babbler after a while, and wonder what your point is. When you finally get to it, you may have lost your audience!
Don’t Fill in the Silence
It’s a good idea to learn to be comfortable with silence. If you’re not, then you may end up chattering just to fill in the void, and then you are not necessarily thinking before speaking (which is crucial to effective communication!). While silence can get awkward, it’s okay to pause now and then, or even just say, “I really need to think for a moment,” and let the silence be a rest between communications.